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my only memory of feeling close to my dad was when he'd let me ride on his shoulder,
i remember that when i was young and i was tired, i would to go my mom and say. "carry me?"
and she would tell me that she was too tired and told me to ask my dad,
and i would go to him and say " carry me?"
and he would always pick me up and let me ride on his shoulders,
i remember what he smelled like, and how it felt to grip on to his hair and feel like i was the tallest person on earth. i loved that .
dad never said no to me, if i needed some extra money, if i wanted to do something, if i got a bad grade he never got mad. and i used to think that if mom and dad got divorced i would go with dad because he never yelled at me or hit me.
but as i got older, i grew to understand that dad didn't care about me. i never talked to him, he never talked to me, we never talked ... and sometimes, its hard to even look at him. in the car, the awkwardness is just overwhelming. and i wish i knew him, i wish i could opened up to him and laugh with him ...

21 years now, and now that i'm studying in america in a good art school,
it's the first time i've heard my mom tell me that he's proud of me...
but he can never tell me that directly...
but that's okay... i just hope in time, we'll be able to fix what went wrong and maybe i'll have new memories to cherish.

I'm sorry to hear about your relation (or lack of) with your dad. But I think he cares about you. (There is no way a dad cannot love and care about his daughter... I think). Some men have a problem expressing their love. Especially down in Asia from where you are from. The fact that he told your...
  • January 19, 2012
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Hey Lisa, I don't know you directly, or your situation. That being said,
From a medical standpoint, little girls tend to bond with their fathers early on. From a mans standpoint, sorry but some of us tend to be straight forword and emotionless. Especially those addicted to cannabis (Unfortunate long ...
  • January 28, 2012
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